Jesus once told a story illustrating the effect that the gospel has on different types of people. The parable of the sower, as it is most commonly known, is a simple story about a sower who sows seed on 4 different types of ground. The first type is the wayside.
Having been trampled by every person that happened to travel that way, the wayside had become hard and impenetrable. The life that had been thrown on it in the little seed was wasted because it could not penetrate the soil. The birds quickly came and ate these seeds.
One of the things that is remarkeable about children is there ability to enjoy the simple things in life. It's like all their senses are on full throttle. Every small joy that most of us take for granted, the singing of birds, picking dandelions, or watching an ant, they intensely enjoy. Their hearts are soft and able to appreciate lifes joys.
Something happens as we get older. We start to compare ourselves with others. We start to want more than what we have. We develop pride that makes us more likely to justify our wrong actions than admit them and change. All these things tend to harden the heart. It's an entirely natural process. Just as dirt, left to itself will get hard all on it's own. So our hearts, unless cultivated, will grow hard. With each wrong action that we justify, each selfish attitude, our hearts get a little harder. We lose our joy in life. We are restless. We need more and more to make us happy, yet overall we feel more and more miserable. We can't have a good time without some stimulant or drug. Life is all about our happiness, yet we can never obtain it.
We try to use people for happiness, but they end up using us as well. We are trampled by others. Our hearts get harder. Our love becomes shallower and shallower. We are unable to recieve and appreciate love, because we cannot love ourselves.
This is the condition we all naturally find ourselves in over time on this earth. It is symbolized by the wayside. There's only one solution. We need the soil of our heart broken up by repentance. Repentance is not just admitting that we are sinners in a general way. It is the deep, heart-felt sorrow over our own particular sins - The very ones we've gotten so use to justifying. Repentance is a supernatural occurence. It's one thing for a drunk to lose his job and family and regret his drinking. He may not necessarily mourn his drinking, so much as the consequences. Many of us when caught in our own sins, will try to change because staying the way we are hurts more than changing. But that is not repentance.
Repentance starts with a heart that is touched by the love of God. We understand that we were placed on this earth to be a blessing. We compare ourselves with the life of Jesus and see how sinful we really are. We hate our sin because they hurt others and they hurt God, who intensely feels all the pain of humanity. Rather than justify, we confess. We desire freedom, not just from this bad habbit or that one, but from all our sinfulness. We desire to be just like Jesus. We desire to be remade from the start.
This is a supernatural occurence. We can't do it on our own, but we can pray for it and seek it. If you feel the call of God on your heart right now, that is the Holy Spirit calling you. Simply cooperate with His leading. Exercise your will and choose to serve Him. God will more than meet you half-way. As you spend time seeking after Him, He will touch your heart and bring you to deeeper and deeper repentance. Your heart will become softer and softer. You will be able to enjoy life again. You will be able to be satisfied and happy. You will have gratitude in your heart. You will be able find real forgiveness and regain your lost innocence.
Find yourself a Bible, read through the New Testament. Read this little book
Post a prayer request or send me a message and I will pray for you. God Bless
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